Friday, July 4, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Vacation

Happy Fourth Of July!!!
Can you believe it? 
The height of summer-it's in full swing.
Days full of heat, sun, water, cricket song at night, and rest.
Our July has fun things coming up:
Camp for Miss B, vacation, and a dear friend's wedding celebration, Dr. appt. for my arm and the quest for rest and learning more while on sabbatical. 

I'll be taking the rest of the month off and will check back in the beginning of August.
I've never done this before, but I'm learning new ways to rest and recharge the creative and spiritual side of me.
So, enjoy summer and all it has to offer. 
Do something new. Rest. Rejuvenate yourself in small ways. 
But whatever you find yourself doing, I hope you are enjoying it!

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Sabbatical


Coming from the Hebrew word "shabat", it literally means a ceasing.
It's a rest from work, or a break, lasting two months to a year.
In being halted from doing lots of things I normally do, I am tentatively looking at the time my shoulder break needs to heal as a sort of "sabbatical", or a gift.
A good thing. 

A novel concept, huh?
Seeing this whole ridiculous time in my life as a gift?

Unfortunately, my first thoughts are, "Why? Why should I see this broken shoulder time as a break? A rest? A gift?"
Rest isn't something I naturally do for an extended time, all though it's something I often think about.
I can struggle all I want. 
Or all I think I need to. Which, really is just pride. 
It doesn't do me much good, 'cause my shoulder just isn't going to work.
I am deciding to learn during these days.
I desire to learn to accept this accident as a gift of restorative time.

And if I deny this TIME I have been given, aren't I shaming the Gift-giver?
So, each day, I will purposely open this gift. 
Savor it.
Lean into it.
Find quietness in it.
Find more of myself in it.
Find the beauty in it.

Hoping you will find a gift of time to open just for you today.

Friday, June 20, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Broken

Well, hello!
It's been a while, so I'll just spend a little time catching up as typing isn't so fun right now.

Our girl graduated with flying colors.

She had a blast, gave an aMAZing speech with her bestest friend in front of the huge crowd, marched herself across the stage for her diploma and showed us all what living in the present moment is all about.

However, her sister and I were a weepy MESS.
So. Many. Emotions.

We managed to forget to take a family photo, but I did get one with her super teacher.

After graduation and all the celebration, we had the house tented for termites.
Oh, wait. I forgot about the great ant invasion BEFORE graduation.
A large colony decided to make itself known two days before all the graduation company came.
They, along with the dreaded termites, are gone now, hopefully to never be seen again.
When we hit the hotel where we stayed while the house was being tented, I don't think I moved for a solid three hours.
I also learned crappy hotel coffee tastes divine in bed.

We moved back into the house, which took three days. It's pretty cool what I can do with only my left arm and Brenna as my right arm.

After putting the house back together, I had an MRI done on my shoulder and got the results:

Fractured outside wall of the shoulder, contusion on the rotator cuff and inflammation of the bicep  muscle.
I am actually rejoicing, because this means NO SURGERY!!!
It also means no lifting with my right arm for six weeks, but I'll take broken and bruised over surgery any day.

photo by brenna

And art? 
Seriously cannot NOT do it. 
I am learning to do some (lots of) things with my left hand and am realizing if I take my time,  don't move my arm, but just move the paper, I can do small, simple journal entries.
Or, I can move my arm a lot more and then spend quite a bit of time icing my shoulder.

thankful for peel away letter masks by Hazel & Ruby

These summer days, I'm learning more than I ever imagined about rest.
About being needy and vulnerable.
About being thankful, the present moment, grace and a huge host of other things.

How about you?
Is your summer looking any different than how you planned?

Happy Friday!!!

Linking to Paint Party Friday

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Words Escape Me

Words escape me for two reasons.
One, for the amazing support and encouragement after last week's post.
I have read a bazillion times that blogs are supposed to be happy.
Sometimes, life just isn't happy and I tend to be more on the realistic side, and darn it, life is just HARD  sometimes.
So, thank you. A million times over for all your kind words.

The other reason words escape me is this photo, entitled,
"What I Did Over Memorial Day Weekend."

Long story short, because most of this is done left-handed:
I took a massive fall trying to help Brenna get control of an out of control bike so she wouldn't end up in a ditch. 
 Massive Fall.
I'll find out later this week if I have torn my rotator cuff.

Meanwhile, I'm processing.
 I'm vacillating wildly between thoughts of crazy fun graduation, possibly not painting for a very long time, letting go of the WHY and being overwhelmed with gratitude for friends and family.

I'll be checking back soon.

Friday, May 23, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Graduation Begins With G. So Does Grief.

I'm gonna be honest with you today.
I'm not sure how to hold all these emotions that are flying around me these days.

In the first hand, my girl is graduating next week.
 In the second hand, we don't know what is next.

First hand: graduation, excitement, lots of "lasts", yearbooks, class parties, class trips, baccalaureate, caps and gowns, finals, looking forward to summer.

Second hand: IEP's, explaining the future to our girl, the unknown, wondering in my own heart what will be next, what is the best next step, what will continue to help her grow?

First hand: Senior chapels, cards and gifts, getting ready for family to gather, planning a party, making pretty things to give away, cleaning out lockers, senior countdown, throwing hats.

Second hand: Fear, frustration, plans not working out, switching mindsets, forging another new path, seeing the gap grow wider, wondering about the future, trying not to look too far ahead, feeling alone in the journey, feeling lost, wondering where the hell the parent manual is and being tired of writing our own manual.

First hand: My girl's tears at leaving those she loves at school, then being fine once she processes it. Her being able to live in the absolute present moment. Joy in the next activity. Spreading her love and hugs. Reading the entries in her yearbook and graduation cards out loud to her and seeing the smiles that spread wide across her face.

Second hand: Waking up at 5:00 am, too many thoughts in my mind. Searching for peace. Finding words that get me through the days:

"But me, I'm not giving up. I'm sticking around to see what God will do. I'm waiting for God to make things right. I'm counting on God to listen to me." micah 7:7, message version
"He will be the sure foundation for your times."Isaiah 33:6, NIV
"I am the world's light. No one who follows me stumbles around in the darkness. I provide plenty of light to live in." john 8:12, message version
"Then showing us the way, one foot at a time down the path of peace." Luke 1:79, message version.

First hand: Listening to my girl talk to herself in her whispers- "I'm excited for senior countdown." "Today we are going to the movies" "This summer, I go to Camp Paivika, then Camp Footprints."

Second hand: Finding empty spots in parking lots where I howl and rage and cry and let out every fear and get really, really honest. Admissions of unbelief, admissions of being exhausted, admissions of not knowing, not understanding, not knowing, vulnerability, confusion frustration and other feelings too numerous to list. 

Stocking my car and purse with kleenex, opening my hands, palms up and reaching out to others. Getting ready for the day, listening to my girl tell me how excited she is for the day's plans (JUST TODAY) and being reminded that she teaches me more than I could ever have imagined, and continuing to take the next step forward.

sharing with Chatting At The Sky.

Tuesday, May 20, 2014


We all know it's that time of year.
It's a mixed bag of anticipation for me with my youngest.
I'm learning to appreciate every day, each moment and hold my hands WAY open.
And make some art.
Which means there are new listing in my Etsy Shop
See over on the right side bar there:
That's it.
Cute stuff.

Little, tiny soldered pendants.
Each one is 1in. x 1 1/2 in.

Each pendant holds a little scrap from a Vintage Children's Primer,

..or in this case a Vintage Dictionary.

They are surrounded by lead free solder and are on a silver plated chain.

Great for a unique gift for your grad.

Even better, one for yourself for making it through the senior year....

I'll be listing more this week..

Thursday, May 15, 2014

Friday Ramblings: Gift Of Time

After being on a tear for several weeks, my days have come to (somewhat) of a screeching halt.
I have termites to thank.
Many thanks as well to the crappy patch job done on the ceiling in my art room that needs to be redone.

I have spent this week waiting for estimates from exterminators, which brings great anticipation. I'm pretty sure one of them will tell me with the next breeze, my house will crumble around my head. 
So far, all I have gotten is a paper with many numbers on it and the gained knowledge that termites are swarming like crazy in our area this year.
I love gathering information.
Can't ever have enough.

I also love hauling all my art stuff out into my kitchen and working away, enjoying the scent of mud being scraped on the ceiling.
Pretty much I think I can patch it by now.
Useful knowledge, really.

Instead of being on a tear to swim meets, school functions, senior tributes and banquets, I am realizing I still remember how to paint and it's coming hard and fast.

Maybe because I'm realizing I might be packing up the house and moving out for three days while my house is tented and I will spend those two days in a coma out by the hotel pool.

Too bad margaritas and heat make me sick, otherwise that would be in the mix.
Great. Now that I know my husband reads this blog I'm in big trouble with that last statement. 
Honey, be glad the coma will not be alcohol induced.
Just the usual exhaustion induced coma.
Sun screen helps. Large amounts of chlorinated water helps.
 Pretty much, I can get high on the smell of a rubber raft and sunshine because it makes me so blessedly happy.

I think I need to stop now.
Plus, another exterminator is coming to give me an estimate. 
Happy Friday.

Linking to Paint Party Friday