Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Random Christmas Musings

Why is the last ornament the hardest to hang on the tree?
It seems there isn't the perfect spot for it and I agonize where it should go.

Is it o.k. to have thoughts of putting my dog to sleep and telling my family she got really sick and rather than spending thousands of dollars in emergency vet bills, we opted for the kind way out. Which might happen if she DOESN'T QUIT CHEWING MY DOOR.

see where we had to cut out the previously chewed part? and she likes door frames as well.

not sure why miss party needs into this room. oh, wait. she likes to shred my artwork.

I can never, ever remember where canned pumpkin is at the grocery store. Every year it is the last thing on my grocery list that I go round and round the store isles looking for and every year I ask a clerk where it is and we go round and round again. I guess I could chalk it up to being my exercise for the day.

Why is it my mother can put 6 gazillion ornaments on her tree and have it look beautiful and when I add more to my tree it looks awful? Then when I don't add a lot, and the tree is in the house for a few days and shifts shapes it looks like it could use several more ornaments....

Do you have a real or a fake tree? We broke down and bought a fake one 3yrs. ago. My eldest daughter thought it was so awful she refused to help decorate it. I don't think it's quite that bad. But I did give in and buy a small real tree for the family room. So now I have TWO trees to decorate by myself.  Since being in college, she's never home to decorate the tree anyway.

What do people do with their silly White Elephant gifts? Do they find room for them on a shelf and plan retribution for the next year? (I do.)

My husband thinks a basket full of tree trunk cuttings makes a great Christmas decoration. He usually puts the basket in front of a sweet vignette I have done. I don't think he realizes that I move it. Truly, he loves his tree trunk cuttings. I guess I can allow him that...

WHAT do you do with your Christmas cards you receive every year????? Do you save them or toss them? Is it o.k. to skip two years in a row in NOT mailing cards out? Probably not. I think we will have New Year's cards this year.

I'm wondering if I fully realize that even though my house is ready for Christmas, I'm moving my daughter home from college and we have to get all her STUFF put away before the 24th.

Do you feel like you have to have the perfect dessert that everyone will like for Christmas dinner, or does it not bother you? I come from a home where my mom likes to make sure everyone is happy for dessert and one year she had (no joke) at least four pies, brownies, and half of a container of peppermint ice cream from Baskin and Robbins for 4 adults and 2 teen-age girls and one child who barfs when she overeats.

Peppermint Ice Cream.
Need I say more?

I wish when we buy Christmas gifts that they came pre-wrapped.

Today I had to figure out how much 7-Up and apple cider to buy to make punch for 120 high schoolers. I quit helping Lauren with math when she was in 4th grade, so this was a big deal for me. I think I got it right, but I might be making a mad dash to the store in the middle of the party tonight. Maybe I should buy a bottle for each person...kinda like dessert.
To make this more fun, I will tell you about delivering 24 bottles of 7-Up and Apple juice to the church. I thought I was pretty smart finding a cart from the kitchen and loading the drinks on it. But when 3 of the litre bottles of 7-Up fell off and landed on my foot, and I watched one roll away down the church parking lot, (which I then had to go chase) I was not feeling so smart anymore. Not to mention that I KNOW I bought 12 bottles of 7-Up, but when I got to church there were only 11 in the car. 
How does this happen?

I think that's it.
How's your Christmas coming along???


  1. And I thought I had it bad.

    You must lay awake at night thinking about "stuff" too.......

  2. So sorry about your dog chewing your door although makes a cute story!

    Thank you so much for stopping by my blog and for your kind thoughts. I would love to have you come by and check out our charity event. I hope it does well!

  3. Oh my gosh...I am dying laughing...
    I want to come to your mother's party~ I would just skip dinner and eat all 4 desserts! Our first dog was like that...chewed the entire corner off our rented apartment wall and wet on our deck ~it dripped down onto the neighbor's furniture he was refinishing and he came up and yelled at me. But he ended up taking pity on the crying 20 year old pregnant girl... You are too funny, Lynn!

  4. Where to start? Where to start?

    I could have written most of these musings. Our little wood eater is a squirrel. He has made a mess of my front porch columns.

    And I have the same issues with the tree. It makes it worse to have Mrs. Claus for a mother, too. We use a real tree. That husband just won't hear of a fake one although I really want one. They just decorate so much easier, IMO.

    I'm lying awake musing right along with you.

    Oh, and I did use sugar free peppermints for the popcorn. Of course, the white chocolate had sugar so it didn't really help all that much.

  5. We have a fake tree. I prefer real, but I'm allergic so that pretty much settles that. We bought our tree five years ago or so and hope to keep it always!
    On white elephant gifts...I seem to recall my parents going to a white elephant party every year with their friends. It was a few weeks after new years, and you wrapped up your worst unwanted gift and they drew numbers or something.
    I keep every card, I have no idea what to do with them all, but for now they inhabit two giant shoeboxes under my bed.
    Our Christmas is coming right along, all the gifts are purchased, half wrapped. Dessert, that's an issue, right? We always end up having just a random plate of cookies and candies, mostly marzipan Mozart-Kugels, ginger cookies, cutouts and maybe brownies.
    Good luck with getting your daughter settled in!

  6. Presents should DEFINITELY come "wrapped"! The big question is why does the big guy in the red suit get all of the credit, when Mrs. Claus is working her butt off?!?1? Loved this post! Hugs, TErri xoxo

  7. Good thing those dogs are cute huh?!
    I've been collecting the tree fresh cuts too, so your husband is not alone. I just finished a post with a picture.
    Merry Christmas!

  8. Okay here goes. I had two labs, litter mates, who loved to chew on wood. The only thing I could find that they loved more, turned out to be a worse alternative -- sheep hooves. The reason they're worse is they get really gooey and REALLY smelly when chewed.

    One night I was lying in bed and thinking...What IS that smell? It seemed to be coming from my pillow. Slowly, tentatively, I reached under. Ugh! I quickly pulled my hand away, whipped the pillow off the bed and there they were - two nicely chewed hooves!

    Midnight snack anyone?


  9. Lynn! My shoulders are still shaking from laughter as I type this! Oh my goodness this is so hilarious and it is nice to know I'm not alone. I got home at 10pm Monday night after going to Costco and Wal-Mart because I wanted to get my shopping done w/o a toddler and went to put something away in an upper cabinet and my hand knocked over an ENTIRE FULL container of fish food! FISH FOOD! Do you know how awful that smells? Let alone how many little flakes can get in every crevice of a room? So, there I was, late at night vacuuming up fish food. Hey, misery loves company right? :-)

  10. I can't believe how long it's been since I've had time to read any posts. So, Your decorations are very nice and I'm so happy Santa approved the tree. I wish somebody would approve mine! Your husband is so wonderful and brave putting up those lights. Sure wish I could see it. I think Brenna should have a Rudolph-in-the-box but I'm so stinking mad that it won't work. Her picture was priceless. Have you been able to find another?

    Totally enjoyed your Christmas musings. It is SO nice to know that others are awake at night musing over the same craziness as me. I have artificial trees at my house but LOVE the smell of fresh. I stress over my ornaments, too. I turn the lights on and off to see I've missed a spot. Crazy.

    Hope the foot is okay from the drinks and the punch turned out fabulously!

    Muse away. I love it.

  11. oh honey, if you don't get a job as a columnist the world will be the poorer for it. I think I've caught my breath. Toss the cards, did you even need to ask about White Elephant retribution? I've been to one of your parties...and laughed my *** off at the hilarity. You didn't even mention last year and opening presents for 4 hours becaue our mother didn't think she'd live to see another Christmas. No qualms this year? Hmmmm??? Not even a little bit??? And just when did you name the dog Miss Party? That alone sends me into spasms of laughter. I think the kind way may be her way one day....Let go of the obsessing, though it has kept us all in stitches, God bless you for that, and imagine yourself in Florence. Ah, the posts you will write for that little adventure :-) Thanks for the belly laughs, sister dear.

  12. Omg! Maybe you have forgotten to feed the dog? How does she even get her mouth dog there to chew on it? You could always put a metal kick plate on it like front doors have :)

    I can't remember the last time I wrote out Christmas cards.

    Dessert anxiety? Yes. We have that in our family. Actually the whole meal is that way. We call it the Dom Delouse syndrome. There is always the fear of not having enough food.

    I love that shot of the old typewrite and the cool pic of Santa.

  13. lynn,
    Honestly, you just crack me up. You are the Erma Bombeck of this generation. You make everything so funny.

    Jud just had his first chemo today and we are so relieved to be on the way...though he isn't feeling too great tonight. Just trying to take all this one step at a time.

    Thanks for all your support and being such a wonderful friend.


  14. Miss Party? Mew iz in BIG HUGE trouble!!!! And that darling iz an understatement!!! How about you start chewing on those tree trimming pieces Dad leaves in the basket. Surely, they are for you anyway. I bet they taste better than the door...go on, give them a try BUT DO NOT put those lips to the door again. Santa Paws is watching and HE KNOWS!

    Lynn. I think you should come over here and sit with me. I'll purr for you and make it all better. Promise. C'mon.....how about if I purr REALLY LOUD?! Feeling better yet?


  15. hahahaha! When I first got Xyla I lay awake at night plotting her demise because I didn't think I could make it through puppy-hood. These were points when I was so sleep deprived and so tired of clean up pee and poop that I thought it wouldn't be worth it. Then she grew up and I love her, wouldn't trade her for the world. I guess growing up may not be an option for you, but I think it is worth it. So glad I'm not the only one to go through "dark" moments with a dog.

    Sorry about the door.

    --Catherine from HomeHinges