Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Continuing the Journaling Journey

Hi friends!
I thought for SURE I would have done at least 3 posts last week, not just one...
The week pretty much got away from me while driving hither and yon, remembering to pick up Brenna at different times. I am so proud of myself! I didn't forget what time to be where once!!
 But this is a new week, so who knows. The school schedule has changed yet once again, so this week is different than the last two. I tell you what. You think you have life down to a science and then the experiment explodes.

So. Journaling. 
I have continued reading my Ragamuffin Gospel.

And this statement hit me between the eyes:

I thought, "yeah. O.k....uh-huh."

"Wait. What?" Toward ourselves? As in, me? Me be kind to myself?

Huh. This is going to take some time to think about. 
You have all been gentle, caring and compassionate toward me the last several weeks as I have geared up for Lauren leaving again and Brenna beginning this new stage of life in High School. I have had a couple of people tell me to be gentle to myself. This has, thankfully, come to my mind during different parts of the last weeks and I have actually listened to the advice.
I really don't do needs very well.  I have them. But they don't fit right. They look like a coat with arms that are too short. I just won't wear it. But it seems like every time I open up the closet, that darn coat is right there, front and center. I think of needs as something that can be taken to the tailor. Just put another layer of material on the coat sleeves, and then the sleeves will be long enough and I can wear the coat.
But it still doesn't fit right.
So, I'll deal with it, and just wear the coat.
 Or toss it out to the Goodwill.

I will think about this statement for a while. 
In my journal I will add this transperancy from a picture I took in my sister's garden:

She is one of my favorites of the statues in her yard.
I think I will use her face in this journal entry because she looks calm and serene.

She doesn't look like her coat is too short in the sleeves.

I will add some color to her, and putz around with the page, all the while thinking about what it looks like to be "compassionate...toward ourselves in our failure and need."

How does your coat fit today?


  1. Hey girlfriend....

    Oh...I promise to be gentle, caring and compassionate as things change once again in your life!!!! xo~

    Now sweets...there is NO WAY I'd be thinking about Christmas EITHER if I wasn't in the business I am. If I wait until October to CREATE then I don't enjoy the season one tiny bit. So...early I plan...early I finish! :) I hope you are ready to ENJOY the chaos through ME! ahhahaha


  2. Oh, I love your description of need as a coat that doesn't fit right! The whole analogy is brilliant...I think more than a few of us forget to be kind to ourselves, being so busy looking after everyone else. We shoulder what we must and soldier on! The hardest thing in the world for me to do is ask for help, no matter how badly I need it..just won't ask. Of course, that's a good part of why I've ended up with Chronic Fatigue and Fibromyalgia!

    Glad the school routine's working smoothly for now, and I'm impressed on the progress you're making with your journal...the statue overlay is gorgeous....


  3. What a great reminder to be kind to ourselves! Sometimes I think it is easier and more natural for us to be kind to others, than it is to nurture and take care of ourselves as well! Love the photo you took of the statue in your sisters garden. Stunning!

  4. This is a beautifully written post, Lynn. I love the way you compare it to an ill fitting coat.
    I have a huge problem in the area of being compassionate to myself in failure, specifically spiritual failure. I lack any compassion for myself at all, which tends to lead to more yet spiritual failure as I flail around in response to that lack of compassion.

  5. Lynn,
    This is so beautifully written...I am going to have to sit with it a bit to really soak it in. You do such an incredible job of explaining these difficult concepts with analogy. I love the coat that doesn't fit.

    i have a lot of trouble with compassion towards myself and need to take my own advice!!

    Love you, sweetpea!

  6. Lynn, this is an excellent post - so well written and the pictures are just as wonderful! I am looking forward to seeing the journal page you create using the stone angel statuary - it is an angel, right?!?!

    Have a wonderful week. And yes, by all means be kind to yourself!


    Romeo and "her"

  7. Hi Lynn! Thanks for stopping by, it's nice to "meet" you! I'm loving your journal pages and art! I'm going to have to check out this book you're reading too, I just looked at it on amazon and it looks really amazing & uplifting!

  8. What a lovely post.. As I have gotten older I have learned to be a little more kinder to myself. But it does not come natural that is for sure. It is a work in progress, I just love your analogy with the coat thats to small.. My coat today is fitting pretty good, but who knows what tomorrow will bring.. Hugs, Linda

  9. I REALLY needed to read this today! I almost don't have words as to how it hit me! Thank you so much for the reminder and for sharing how God is working on you these days!

  10. lovely heartfelt and expressive post ... again dear Lynn
    you express yourself beautifully!

    I have to say the last photo really makes me drool almost as much as your oatmeal raisins cookie post!

    I applaud you and Brenna btw for being brave enough to turn on the oven too ;)

  11. I think my collar might be too tight right now....perhaps I can loosen it and then maybe my coat might fit a little bit better.

    I have been trying really hard lately to be a little kinder and gentler with me and I think I have been having some success.

    It isn't easy, is it?

    Or natural.

    But I'm working on it!

    Maybe you could go sleeveless???

    You are the best!


  12. Wow...great post! And I'm afraid to say that mine fits (or rather does not fit), much like yours my fren. It is so very hard for me to be nice to me....and I'm not sure why, but that is something I'm working on myself. Maybe we can help each other.

    Sendin hugs,